By Katherine Barkman
(A lost passport, lost luggage, getting lost – Katherine Barkman writes about the things she and fellow Ballet Manila principal artist Rudy De Dios had to contend with on the way to Latvia and while in Hong Kong for recent gala performances.)
I can’t begin to describe how thankful I was when I was invited to be a guest performer at the Ballet Stars in Jurmala Gala in Latvia as well as the Asian Grand Prix Winners Gala in Hong Kong, one event happening soon after the other earlier this month.
My ultimate dream is to travel the world dancing and performing for people from all different places. These were fantastic opportunities for me, especially as a young principal dancer (all of the other gala stars have at least five to ten years’ experience on me). Not only was I being given the chance to perform alongside big stars of ballet, but to share my art at an international level. I was very excited to even be a part of such events and getting to travel and see the world while doing what I love.
After a lot of rehearsing and preparation, my partner Rudy and I were off to Latvia. We left Manila in high spirits. I felt ready to perform my very best. But at the same time, I felt the weight of responsibility riding on my shoulders. I was not only representing myself as a 19-year-old principal but also the whole of Ballet Manila and ballet in the Philippines. I felt the pressure to be flawless. But at the same time, I reminded myself to just enjoy the experience and remember I wasn’t there to be perfect. I was there to perform and give my soul to the audience.
Our flight from Manila to Istanbul took 12 hours. I stretched on the plane but mostly tried to rest and get my energy ready for performing. Once in Turkey, we had a ten-hour layover. About three hours before our connecting flight, we realized my partner had lost his passport. For the next three hours, we were in a frenzy running all over the airport.
We were trying to find wi-fi to contact Ballet Manila and ask what we should do. We tried to communicate with the airline but no one seemed to be able to help us. The language barrier only complicated things. We were panicking and confused and tired. But then we received a message from our artistic director telling me to get on the plane and I would be given another partner in Latvia. So I had to leave Rudy at the gate. I cried as I took the costume bag from him. I was so tired, so frustrated – but mostly, I was scared at the fact I was now going this alone.
I wiped my tears and I prayed. And then I was at peace because I realized I could do this. And I would still perform. That was my focus – that I would soon be on stage in Jurmala.
When I landed in Riga, I was jet-lagged but buoyed by a new attitude. An attitude of confidence that no matter what I would face during this adventure, I would stay positive and accept the challenge to learn and grow.
As it turned out, when I got off the plane, I was greeted with good news and bad news. The good news was receiving a message that Rudy’s passport had been found and that he would arrive the next morning in time to rehearse. The bad news? The airline had lost my luggage! Luckily, I am extremely careful when I pack when traveling to perform. In my carry on baggage, I always pack at least a pair of pointe shoes for the show as well as leotard and tights and an extra outfit and of course all the costumes.
While I knew I would be uncomfortable for the next few days without my usual belongings, I reminded myself I had with me everything I needed to perform. That kept me calm enough. I took it as a lesson in simplicity. I realized I didn’t need a lot to be happy. Performing was enough for me. Frankly speaking, I barely missed my luggage!
Traveling always brings surprises. But as a ballerina, for me, that is all secondary. I stayed calm and focused on what I was there to do. I was there to light up the stage. And Rudy and I did just that. We enjoyed every second of performing. The audience also enjoyed us as we received great response and cheers. It was a performance I will never forget. The sheer happiness I felt as I bowed… it was an affirmation that this is why I was put on this earth. All obstacles I faced I was strong enough, smart enough and brave enough to overcome.
We also enjoyed the whole experience of being in Latvia. We saw old Riga, walked the shore of the Baltic Sea and made connections with the other ballet stars of the gala. It was a few days of tremendous growth and happiness. I just took it all in.
When we arrived back from Latvia, we had about only 36 hours in Manila before flying to Hong Kong for our next appearance at the Asian Grand Prix. Even after a long day of traveling, I always give myself barre and stretch in my own room or in my hotel room immediately after getting off of the plane! It helps to put the body in place and stay in shape for the performance ahead. Even if I am so exhausted, I just find a chair or something to hold on to and do my exercises. Fighting jet lag and fatigue, I went to class the next morning and even rehearsed before heading to our next destination.
We arrived in Hong Kong and were greeted with such warmth. The AGP was very generous in their accommodations. We had more adventures there – exploring the metro and even getting lost once trying to get to class! But these are experiences you just figure out along the way and learn from. Thankfully, we had another successful performance for the AGP Winners Gala. We danced from our hearts and I think the audience felt that and enjoyed it.
Now back in Manila, I have just four days before the opening of the BM season and dancing a lead role in Martin Lawrance’s Rebel. Definitely, this profession is not for the faint of heart or the weak-spirited. There are so many challenges to face every single day. And as we experienced on our back-to-back trips, when traveling, you have to expect the unexpected. The most important thing is to accept the obstacles in front of you. Fight to overcome them. Learn from the process. And while doing all these, keep the love in your heart and make your passion your focus.
These past two weeks have been two of the most memorable and happiest times of my career so far. I look forward to all the adventures ahead!
(At the time of writing, Katherine had yet to recover her luggage. It had apparently reached Latvia but by then, she had already left. The wayward suitcase is reportedly back in Manila, at the airport. She is hopeful they will be reunited one day soon.)